Lamentably prolific sculptor Zurab Tsereteli has marked his territory all over Moscow, most prominently with the 315-foot statue of Peter the Great protruding from the Moscow River. There’s no hiding from the thing; it’s one of the tallest statues in the world. Less obtrusive but still double take-worthy is his 10-foot bronze monument to Alexy II, the first Russian Patriarch of the post-Soviet period (and an alleged KGB agent!). The 2003 monument drew attention on Monday as members of the Russian Academy of Arts gathered around it to mark the late father's 80th birthday. They dubbed the place their “spiritual courtyard.” We dub the chapel behind it “the crystal saltshaker.”

In addition to the chapel and the monument, Tsereteli has placed giant bas-reliefs of Russian saints along the perimeter of the courtyard; they’re replicas of the medallions from the Cathedral of Christ the Savior — the Orthodox Church dynamited by Stalin and tackily rebuilt under Yeltsin. And who oversaw the bas-reliefs for that reconstruction? Tsereteli, of course! People criticize the guy, but we have to give him credit. You’ll rarely find a public sculptor so adept at making every work a monument to himself. We just feel bad for the drunks who fall asleep in the courtyard and wake up with larger-than-life saints staring down at them.

A Spiritual Courtyard Opens in Moscow in Honor of Alexy II [RIA Novosti]

Photo: "Zurab Warholified"